The other day I had a conversation with somebody I had cancelled and unfollowed for years. Did you have to unfollow me they asked? Did you have to like my posts? I hit back.
I had blocked them on all accounts however according to them my posts just happened to pop up in their timeline. As for how true that statement was I could not verify, it is however their answer that got my over thinking brain working.
“People post on social media because they want to feel relevant, and so in liking you are kind of validating them.”
Frenemy
Whatever made them think I would appreciate their validation was beside me, however I was left the questioning the validity of their statement. Did they have a point?”. To investigate their theory I went on a fact finding mission and asked some of my friends;
Why do people post on social media?
Most people started with Facebook with the majority of us doing it to preserve our photos in case of losing the phone or damage to the memory card. While some of my peers still use social media as a memory album, it was interesting to hear what a few of my friends had to say when I paused the above question to them.
- To pass time and burn data- basically out of boredom. One of my friends even went on to say “My phone, my data, my happiness”. with the increasing rate of loneliness people use social media as a form of connection. With some stroke of luck, a comment or like to a post might lead to engagement which might fulfill the poster and viewer.
- To celebrate achievements and milestones with the world- be it another year added to ones’ life, graduation from a course, just to show others the world could be a happy place.
- To share pain, and perhaps find healing– A problem shared, problem solved; RIGHT? Sadly, posts on this purpose might delay healing or exacerbate pain depending on who is at the end. Some people lack emotional intelligence and sympathy, and one might find themselves worse off. I personally love to shy away from posting such.
- To belong– I have recently acquired a friend on TikTok. A mother to a special needs child she created a page for herself and her and her child and since I also have a similar page my live popped up on her timeline and we connected. When I interviewed them later on an awareness live she said, her reason of sharing their journey on social media was to her community. An ideal I also had.
- For entertainment purposes- Well the reason for most of my posts. I like to entertain myself and express myself creatively. I do however find that I tend to entertain others in the process. Thus my content is more subjective than projective.
- Because others are doing it– done by the frivolous, that go with the flow and hardly have any care in the world. Serves the purpose of entertainment, remaining noticeable, the need to belong, all in one.
- For brand awareness and to sell products or services those in businesses answered. This type of posting is geared towards influencing the audience and might lead to depression if the post is not received as expected.
- To have a voice– social media gives people a platform to express themselves, their ideas, opinions and just like the brand awareness it might lead to depression if the voice is meant to influence, and people do not respond accordingly or mis the narrative.
If then its not for the relevance of the person, could posts be to save a purpose??
Perhaps this could be true for those seeking influence and heal. I am however not sure if the viewer going through the post, liking it and not applying it save the objective. However a like on the post of one seeking validation could perhaps spare them from depression.
It could be argued that knowing that there is another person who shares the same sentiments would do one good and not have them feel they all alone and crazy. But to have people engage with your content and remain unchanged is most definitely disheartening. You would be forgiven like Jesus for asking..
Have I been among you all this time and you do not know me, Philip? The one who has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say, “Show us the Father’?
JOHN.14:9
Does that mean Likes do not matter then?
Certainly not. This variable is mainly depended of the purpose of your post. If it is passing time, save memories or entertain yourself then getting likes or engagement really shouldn’t matter. However, if it is for the purposes of influencing, then likes my may matter.Likes contribute to the algorithm pushing your content. Depending on the viewing time it might get the algorithm to think your content is most likely relative and you might find your community.
My take, do not let likes determine your relevancy. At times it is the very post that had less likes and engagement that influenced most people. Remember the story of the ten lepers in Luke: 11-19?
After healing ten lepers, Jesus was shocked to see only one leper return to give him praise. Perplexed he asked, “Where there not ten healed and one returned, where are the others?” While people may post to pass time, entertain themselves or boast, people that post for the purposes of influencing others, should always remember the story of the lepers and be encouraged to continue sharing their messages with the world. While likes and engagements may give an indication of who was present, the influence may have gone beyond the register.
As for my frenemy who liked and commented on my content knowing very well that I did not want them in my space, I think they were the ones trying to be relevant to me. perhaps their likes where to act as reminders of they existence, the evil they did me, and prolong my pain to their satisfaction. Was I wrong to draw this conclusion?
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